I attended yet another competition in Camden on Saturday (missing Rob's grand return to Norfolk), which turned out to be quite productive. After a slow and generally unorganised start, the fencing began. After the first poule, I felt great. The adrenaline was flowing, and all of my pent up energy from a two hour journey was bursting out of me. I had won two matches, and lost two matches. The two that I lost, I lost 5-4, both to fencers who had rankings above 15. After a half hour wait, the second round of poules began. Afterwards, I still felt great. This time, I had won three and lost two. Once again, the two that I lost were both 5-4. Incidentally, the second loss was against someone who had beaten me in the English Youth Championships, 5-1. He won this time on a simultaneous lunge, in which he had the point in line first. A significant improvement. After an hours wait, the Direct Elimination started, and I lost 15-10. I wasn't particularly disappointed, as the fencer in question said he felt genuinely challenged by me, and his father said that I gave him a hell of a fight. It was only afterwards that I was told he was seeded 2nd in the Leon Paul series.
That day, I feel that I fenced really well, but how did I manage it? I think that initially I felt relaxed, and confident in my abilities. When I fenced the EYC fencer, however, I was loosing 4-2. I have to admit, I was pretty angry. My ripostes and beat attacks had landed flat, and he had scored on the counter. I felt pretty raging. I brought it back up to 4-4, and then lost 5-4, but only after several off-targets and simultaneous hits. The same thing happened in the DE. Parry ripostes were just landing flat on this guy. After the first break, I was down 8-4. A man approached me and said 'Try getting low. Left handers don't like that.'. It seemed they didn't. 8-6. Then it went to 12-9. I was angry. I had clearly lost the DE. I had done all the right techniques, but none of them had registered. Why? Was the equipment against me, or something bizarre like that? I was angry. Rage. 12-10. What? How did that happen? 15-10. It seemed to pass in a seething blur. Thankfully, my rage subsided on the thirteenth point, and I managed to accept my defeat gracefully.
Branching off, the Sith said that your anger made you more powerful, and the Jedi said that it would eventually destroy you. Which one? It certainly doesn't seem evil, but then again, it probably doesn't until it's far too late. However, there are two sides to every sword. Rage, and relaxation. The challenge will be to balance them out. I accept the challenge. En guarde!
2 comments:
To go en guarde with an enemy is one thing, but to go en guarde with yourself is completely the opposite. It is best to understand the anger, rather than try to fight it. Just know that it is there and try to be somewhere else. I always find thinking of something really funny helps. Not something amusing, but laugh-out-loud-till-you-cry-and-wet-yourself funny. But don't acutally cry or wet yourself, because that would mean you would lose by default... I digress.
Just unserstand that anger is there, and make an extra effort to dispell it rather than fight it. You're already at war with another person, don't be fighting two fronts at once!
Thanks for the tips.
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